Understanding men
Lesson 4: Men need space
Imagine how you would act if you would be home alone. Now imagine how he would act if he would be alone. And now draw an imaginary red line between your life and his life. We will be speaking a lot about this red line later on when we talk about saving or keeping a relationship. But already now you should know that everything about your relationship takes place on this red line or in its area. It is all about how deep you penetrate his territory or how far he goes into yours. Sometimes it only takes the understanding of this game to save a relationship.
But for now all I want to say is: men need their space. So do women!!! You will say. But in the 90% of the time, we can get it and they can’t.
Why is it like that? Because for them, as Saint-Exupery wisely said once: “Love is not gazing in each other’s eyes, but looking together in the same direction”. But for us love is gazing in each other eyes. We need their attention, their touch; we need their eyes to be on us. A guy comes home thinking: OMG what a long day I had today. I just need a shower and some quiet. And you come home thinking: OMG what a long day I had. I need a treat. I need a foot massage. I need a compliment or two. I need a lot of attention. And I want it all from him.
The biggest lecture we all have to learn in living with men is that we only get attention by not asking for it. Just by going back behind your red line, by learning to be complete with ourselves and making space for them to come to us by themselves. With a guy, nothing is reached by pressure, but only by soft influence, and we will still have to talk about it a lot.
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