As the years pass by, most women feel that they know themselves better and in the same time it is harder for them to find their man. Every friend of theirs has something to say: “You are searching for your fantasy man, no one like that lives on this planet”, “Don’t compromise girl”, “Go out more, meet more people”, “No point in going out, you wont find a husband in a bar” and lets not forget the mother that always remind her daughter that “When I was your age I already had 2 kids”.
And you keep building your relationship dream with your future family and husband, you dress up for every occasion, maybe you’ll meet him today. You read all the newspapers, implementing all the advices. And still things are going no where, your natural clock is ticking and you wonder if you did something wrong. After all you are smart and pretty funny, maybe you don’t look like Angelina Jolie but you surely look better than all the women who went to high school with you and who already got married.
So lets try together to sort things out. When we are stuck we usually responed to the situation in one of these 3 ways:
1. We accept it.
2. We don’t accept it and working like crazy to change it.
3. We control it and we don’t let it control us.
There are 2 ways to take in accepting the situation: the first one is to get passive, to accept your destiny as it came from above, to sit at home and to wait. These kind of women wait for the prince to knock at their door with 12 red roses. If you’ll choose to go this way you might be waiting for many years. And even if the prince will come he’ll be used to being the prince and if you’ll get active in the relationship it can cause many problems. So you’ll be loosing from all sides.
The second way of accepting is to choose to live your life as one who doesn’t search, to concentrate on your career or in enjoying life. To go to a bar to dance and drink with friends and not in order to find a husband. Many times in life good things happen to us when we are not chasing them directly but most chances are that it would be hard for you to give up the search and then you will become aggressive.
The aggressive hunter
When you are not willing to accept the fact of feeling alone and you are so tired of being alone you might become aggressive. You’ll start marketing yourself with a lot of noise, hunting men down only to make them run away and if they’ll stay it might even be worse as you’ll be stuck with a weak man that cant satisfy you.
The active woman
Don’t let it control you, you should control it.
Being active means to be slightly assertive, it means to manage your life knowing what you deserve, knowing your true
value. You mark a target and go for it, you are complete with yourself and you never come to date feeling supreme or inferior, you are not looking for salvation but for a partner.
If you are an active woman you know that you deserve to be happy and you are looking for a man to help you achieve that and not a weak man you can control or one who you forced into marriage by getting pregnant or in other ways. We all deserve a rich, handsome, smart and successful man but the active ones will find the best man for her and wont wait for Brad Pitt to knock at her door.
And most important! most men love a slightly assertive woman!
So how do you become one?
How do you stop feeling alone? Because we are all tired of being alone I decided to write down a few rules that every assertive woman should follow:
1. I m entitled to say no.
2. I m allowed not to understand.
3. I can make mistakes.
4. I have a right to speak my opinion.
5. I have a right to achieve my goals.
6. I should demand and receive my respect.
7. I m responsible for my actions and their results.
8. I accept full responsibility over my life and everything that happens is a result of my actions and decisions.
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